The Manbat Wayne Bruzinski sat at his laptop at the Man cave surfing through videos on U-toob. One in particular was of interest to the would be crime fighter. A local hunter had made many videos involving crossbows. In one video the hunter had attached a steel cable to a bolt and used it to drag a large deer uphill after scoring a killing hit on the beast. "As any good hunter knows: If you hit a deer and it doesn't die from the impact it will run a short while before succumbing to injury. And the path of least resistance will be taken. In example: down hill, every time." The man in the video explained. He went on tell about how he would use the steel cable in such an event as hunting in the hills. It made it easier to bring the large animal back up the hill, using a winch compared to just dragging it by hand.
"Oh snap. I gottta get a cross bow!" Wayne began to search the internet for one when he came across and ad for a gun and knife show. It was three weeks away, giving our hero plenty of time to save up for the weapon. Wayne would use this crossbow and steel cable combo as a means around the grapple gun quandary. Surely if the device could hold a 250 lbs deer it would have no problem letting the Manbat climb buildings or repel down structures. He could only speculate about how awesome it would be to have this, letting him really get the drop on crime.
Weeks later Wayne went to the gun show and found a man selling crossbows. "This beauty here is all you need. Got enough torque to bring down anything you aim at." The man promised.
"How will it penetrate surfaces such as brick or metal?" Wayne asked.
The man looked at Wayne quizzically.
"Uh, I want to know what to use during target practice. So I don't kill my neighbor or loose an arrow." Wayne explained.
"It's called a bolt, jack ass, and this baby will shoot hard enough to penetrate brick and sheet metal. You'd be best served to use a dirt hill as a back drop when target shooting." The greasy man told Wayne.
Bruzinski, with stars in his eyes and a grin he could not hide, forked over his last couple of weeks pay for the crossbow. This wouldn't help him wen rent was due, but he finally got a legit grapple gun. Wayne bought a few bolts with the left over cash and hurried to his car. He threw the crossbow in the back seat on top of his gym bag and dashed off for his training camp.
The training camp was a dilapidated warehouse that had been abandoned for years. Wayne had spent time turning it into a haven where he could hone his skills and work out. He mostly just looked at porn and did push ups, occasionally punching a heavy bag he had hung from an I-beam. Wayne entered the building and got his crossbow out and propped it against the table he used for a work bench. It took Wayne several hours before he could attach the steel cable he had bought weeks prior to the bolts. He took some test shots at the ceiling on the warehouse, using a large square of sheet metal as the target. The bolts came disconnected from the cable every shot so he switched to shooting at the wall until he succeeded.
Finally, the cable held as he fired the bolt and he was overjoyed by the outcome. Wayne would fire the bolt into the ceiling so he could climb up and retrieve the other bolts he had fired. Wayne braced himself and fired the crossbow. His aim held true and the missile lodged into the metal square. He pulled against the steel cable to make sure it wouldn't budge. Feeling good about the anchor strength Wayne jumped up and grasped the cable. He pulled himself up about a foot from the ground and held himself steady. The ceiling groaned and creaked for a moment. Bruzinski's grip slipped and he landed back on his feet.
Wayne figured he needed gloves for the climb and he donned the whole Manbat outfit, he would need to climb in it any way and what better time than training. He went back to the steel cable, this time pushing the work bench over to get a better jump start before he started his climb. He climbed on the table, jumped and grabbed the line. He went hand over hand a few times before he heard a snap and he fell back to the concrete floor. He blew his knees out on impact and sunk to the floor screaming. He lay on his back as the ceiling above him began to buckle. The Manbat, in all his cunning, had fired the bolt into the industrial air conditioning unit. His weight had caused the ceiling to crumble and the clamps holding the 600 lbs unit to snap. The whole thing came down on the Manbat crushing his body as well as his dreams to thwart crime.
Wayne's body was not found for some two years when a bulldozer operator discovered it when the building had been approved for demolition.
No comments:
Post a Comment